February 10th was a tough day for the Concord-Carlisle lacrosse program.
That afternoon, longtime head coach Tom Dalicandro surprised his team with the announcement of his resignation for reasons that are still unclear and unfair to many.
Since starting as an assistant in 1993, over the last 31 years, Dalicandro has been synonymous with high school lacrosse in Massachusetts. The young men that have turned into role models, fathers and husbands thanks in large part to going though his program would all attest to just how special of a coach he is.
That’s what made this particular team meeting so difficult.
“It was emotional, especially for me,” Dalicandro said in a phone interview earlier this week. “I’m an emotional person. I am who I am. I wanted them to know I was healthy. I didn’t want them to worry about me and think this was something health wise. It was emotional, t was hard. I think it was confusing maybe to a lot of them.
Dalicandro took over as the head coach of the program in 2001, winning two state titles in 2012 and 2021. The Patriots won at least 12 games in 19 of those seasons (excluding 2020) and won 15 games or more 12 times, including three 20+ win seasons with a 22-0 mark in 2012.
Back when he started coaching, there were only a handful of teams that were considered perennial powerhouses and contenders in Massachusetts. Now, as he departs, Dalicandro has helped further cement Concord-Carlisle’s place in that conversation every single year.
“I went to Newton North, graduated in 1985 and back then, there were like 25 teams maybe in the state,” he said with a chuckle. “There were like four or five blue bloods that ran the show. Newton North was one. C-C was one. The growth, not just for our program but lacrosse, starting in the 90’s was just amazing. The level of talent…I think about the early days when I played, the level of talent there is now is just unbelievable. Great coaches, great club programs, great high school programs. It’s been so good to see the game grow as much as it has.
“Duxbury didn’t have a team when I started coaching. Medfield wasn’t a program. Those guys have helped this game skyrocket. Coaches like John Pynchon at St. John’s Prep. Brian Vona at Lincoln-Sudbury. What those guys have done is just incredible, all of those programs are elite and those guys have been able to keep their programs humming. I’m excited to see where the game is at right now.”
Luckily for those in the lacrosse community hoping this isn’t the end for Dalicandro, your fears can be put to rest. He will be on a sideline somewhere this season, he’s just not sure where yet. Dalicandro will still be heavily involved with the Concord-Carlisle community as well as a football coach and middle school gym teacher.
“It’s been heartwarming to know so many people care about me,” Dalicandro said when asked if any coaches had reached out to have him join their team. “You never really know about it, but I’ve had so many coaches reach out to me to ask me to be on their sidelines. It’s been incredible. I will absolutely be coaching this spring. I don’t know what else I would do. I’m a coach. I’m coming off of middle school girls basketball season which was so fun. I coach. That’s what I do. I’m a phys-ed teacher during the day, in the afternoon I’m a coach. I really can’t see myself not doing something. i’m still trying to figure out, emotionally what I want to do, because the kids in CCHS lacrosse are my No. 1 concern.
“I really want them to be in a good spot and I know they will be. I’m just sort of seeing what’s happening with this position because I want the best for them and then I’ll go from there. I’ll probably go somewhere. I can’t see myself not coaching. It’s just what I do and if I go home after school, my wife isn’t going to be happy.”
As difficult as this entire situation has been. Dalicandro leaves the program with his head held high, a sterling reputation amongst his peers and nothing but fond memories of his time leading the Pats.
“My memories of Concord are nothing but positive when coaching lacrosse at Concord-Carlisle,” he said. “So many kids that I’ve had, it’s just been awesome. I’ve had great parent support throughout my career. I’ve had great coaches on my amazing staffs that love kids. I’ve made so many friendships through the coaching world. Honestly, it’s been a fairytale. I really feel like everything I did for the last 31 years has been for Concord-Carlisle. I love it. It’s been awesome and I really feel lucky.
“Everything is good and honestly, lacrosse has been nothing but positive. I have amazing friendships and relationships with parents I’ve had over the years. The kids have been the best. Thinking about all of the kids – who are mostly adults now – that have come through the program and still keep in touch. My time there was very special.”
What’s his favorite memory you ask? Well, that’s a tough one, but it’s actually more about a belief and a way of doing things that Dalicandro had and was able to maintain for all of these years that he’s most proud of.
“You know what I remember the most about the program? We’ve been able to have a no-cut policy in the 30 years I’ve been associated with it,” Dalicandro added. “We have somewhere between 75-80 kids playing lacrosse at Concord-Carlisle and we never turned a boy away.
“Playing high school sports is so important. It was so important for me as a kid. The lessons you learn being on a team are so important. I’ve surrounded myself with other coaches in the program who feel the same way. So, the best memory is just not turning any kids away and being able to give an opportunity to anyone that wants to come out. It feels good to think about that. And obviously, having my son come through the program is the cherry on top.
“And hey, we weren’t that bad either.”
